|“A man who removes mountain, begins by carrying small stones”, a Chinese proverb defines how difficulty in every sphere of our life can be resolved. As a School counsellor sits to resolve difficulty faced by young children in academics, social interaction, conduct problems or are low on confidence and motivation, it is vital to work step by step. With goals set and honoured, every little achievement is taken as reward in the kitty. From counselling the parents on how to bring up their little darlings with the changing time amidst the challenges of technology and the evolving educational system, every day is thought-provoking and equally inspiring.
Compassion, Patience and perseverance with kids is the only key to a successful intervention. The difficulty or a disorder as many say, is not a tag, rather a name that has can be dealt and succoured. Our best efforts need to be work holistically to achieve the most, possible out of a young mind. With that, we walk everyday helping the children with special needs to achieve the finest of their abilities with unsurpassed guidance, support and a shield to assist in preparing them to be the “best of themselves”.
|There comes a time when the risk to remain uptight in a bud is more painful that the risk it takes to blossom. Let us facilitate our children’s blossoming, as they learn from not only the hard tasks but also from soft touches. So, softly strike the right chord of parenting. I agree that life isn’t a neat little script that can be memorized and performed. The real life drama catches us unprepared and at times we may do and say things we regret, we do not mean at all, yet there is never a point of no return.
There are a few basic principles we can depend upon :
||We can take time to listen to our children’s feelings or talk about our own feelings.
||We can work in terms of future solutions rather than put blame.
||We may lose track temporarily but chances are we’ll never lose our way completely again.
|REMEMBER, PARENTING IS A GREAT BALANCING ACT
||- Lend a patient ear to all that your children have to say.
- Always be there for your children.
- Frequently show unconditional love.
- Hold children and give them big bear hugs, kisses and pats.
- Remain unruffled and calm when they show difficult behaviour.
- Always be positive in your approach and criticize constructively.
- Apologize if you make a mistake.
- Don’t be a inconsistent in your demand or behaviour as it confuses the child.
- Don’t teach the child that power is all that counts.
- Never force your own desires and ambitions on your child.
- Always make them feel wanted, special and “an apple of your eye”
|To sum up, we as parents must possess the high flying spirit of guiding and motivating our children. Our children are special to us. Let’s enjoy our belongings with the acceptance of the hard fact that Birth is much, Nurturing is more . . .
|Everyday, you have another chance to make things better.
Some days are better than others. On those days that go less well, we usually end up being hard on ourselves. Here are some tools to avoid doing so.
1. Keep going. Don't let life's changes throw you off track, but remember that most difficult circumstances are temporary. Gain more clarity by staying the course and channeling your energy in a positive direction.
2. Trust yourself. Believe in your inner resources, no matter what, and you'll grow from the experience. I believe that the answers usually lie within and you are probably smart enough to figure out what you need to do. Give yourself a little time and have patience.
3. Be friends with life. Remember that the world is not out to get you and it does not punish you. You do that to yourself. Learning to focus on other opportunities or in another direction can give you some perspective.
4. Watch your thoughts. Your thinking will never be 100 percent positive. You must learn to dismiss the negative thoughts and stay open to other ideas that will help you move in a positive direction. Start recognizing negative thoughts and use your mind to quell them.
5. Summon the strength you have inside. Learn to access and direct your strengths to the highest good for all concerned. Believe that your strength and intelligence can help you deal with anything. Remember that you have survived worse.
6. Learn to love yourself. You do not have to be who you are today, and your life is not scripted. Changing how you feel about yourself means creating a strategy, gathering some new tools, and making yourself into the person you want to be. A good way to start is to stop doing things that hurt.
7. Don't want too much. Desire can be a powerful motivating tool, but wanting something too much can be very painful and very expensive, so don't live beyond your means or covet the unattainable. Seek your desire, but keep your integrity.
8. Recognize that disappointment is part of life. Even the most successful people have to deal with disappointment, but they've learned how to use it to get to the next level of life. The trick is to process your feelings, then take some kind of action.
9. Deal with your fears. Overcoming fear makes you stronger, and being a little scared can make you better. You want to have butterflies; you just want them flying in formation. It helps to understand and admit your fears. Then you can kick them to the curb.
10. Feel good about yourself. No matter what life brings. Know that each time you wake up, you have another chance to make things better. Don't waste it.
|“Your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as your own unguarded thoughts.” - Buddha
Your Thought Shape Your Reality
|1. Become aware and inquisitive.
Every time a thought that produces a negative emotion pops into your head, contemplate the origin of this thought and question the validity of it. Remember that beliefs are nothing more than repeated thoughts, so question your beliefs as well.
2. Feed positive programs to your mind.
Once you’re aware of a negative story in your head, replace it with its positive counterpart.
3. Make your environment positive.
Surround yourself with peaceful, uplifting stimuli.
4. Associate with positive people.
Think of your current relationships, and define whether some of those people are feeding negative programs to your subconscious mind. Send the toxic people away from your life.
|“When you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt.” - Honore de Balzac
You know what that voice in your head says…
You can’t do it. You’ll never be good enough. You’re going to fail.
This voice taunts you whenever you set a goal. It criticizes you when life gets difficult. It beats you down when you struggle to stand up against its running commentary.
You know you shouldn’t let self-doubt bother you, but it’s a sneaky critter. Sometimes, you just can’t contain it and it slips past your barriers.
And self-doubt is greedy. When it’s loose, it devours your confidence, strips logic and reason from your mind, and steals happiness from your heart. In return, it leaves you with only fear and insecurity.
Try using these steps :
- Identify and ease your doubts. Learning how to recognize when your self-talk takes a turn for the worse is crucial. When you hear yourself saying, "I can't," or, "I don't know," or, "What if," a red flag should go up.
- Stop listening to toxic people. Toxic people are convinced that everything is impossible, and they are quick to shoot down ideas. They'll poison your mind into a state of hopelessness.
- Trust and love yourself. You probably spend more time being your own worst enemy instead of being your own best friend.
- Give yourself permission to try.and try again. Self-doubt never disappears. Over time, you just get better at dealing with it. It will greet you every time you fall out of your comfort zone and whenever you strive to do something great.
|Setbacks are inherent to almost every worthwhile human activity, and a number of studies show that optimists are in general both psychologically and physiologically healthier."
Even if positive thinking does not come naturally to you, there are plenty of great reasons to start cultivating affirmative thoughts and minimizing negative self-talk.
Optimism Can Improve Your Immunity
In recent years, researchers have found that your mind can have a powerful effect on your body. Immunity is one area where your thoughts and attitudes can have a particularly powerful influence. In one study, researchers found that activation in brain areas associated with negative emotions led to a weaker immune response to a flu vaccine. Researchers Segerstrom and Sephton found that people who were optimistic about a specific and important part of their lives, such as how well they were doing in school, exhibited a stronger immune response than those who had a more negative view of the situation.
Positive Thinking Is Good for Your Health
Not only can positive thinking impact your ability to cope with stress and your immunity, it also has an impact on your overall well-being. The Mayo Clinic reports a number of health benefits associated with optimism, including a reduced risk of death from cardiovascular problems, less depression, and an increased lifespan. While researchers are not entirely clear on why positive thinking benefits health, some suggest that positive people might lead healthier lifestyles. By coping better with stress and avoiding unhealthy behaviors, they are able to improve their health and well-being.
There is something called ADHD...
I have never counted the number of steps I take to move around,
My heart is in my dreams while my foots touch the ground.
People say that I am hyper and I can’t sit at one place,
How would they understand that I want my own space.
They see me jumping up n down,
I pass them a smile, they give me a frown.
I am not invited on birthday’s n dinners,
There has to be a diff place for sinners.
I was born like everyone else in the town,
With cheeks so red and eyes light brown.
Mum had no idea what was to fall on her,
Coz of me the whole family suffered.
The relatives grew angry n impatient,
My family stood by me with love n affection.
I had no friends, no one to talk or play,
I would move towards them, they would ,walk away.
I was thrown out of one school and another,
Every time the broken pieces of courage mom would gather.
Holding me in her arms she would gently kiss my forehead,
And told me I was special, I have to move ahead.
Until one day my teacher thrashed me black n blue,
She thought on her seat I had spread the white glue.
I pleaded innocence but she would hardly listen to me,
My earlier mischief’s would affect her memory.
I stood their gazing the ground in the principal’s office,
She took extra pains bringing my mistakes to notice.
I was a popular name in the school by now,
It was always me to be punished every time somehow.
Before saying ‘Good morning’ the teachers shouted out my name,
Math’s, Eng or science every teacher did the same.
Every class started with me being picked upon,
I was called Useless, Nasty, Troublemaker and so on.
Once it so happened, I wasn’t there in the class,
The teacher shouted my name surprising the whole mass.
She screamed “ ediiiiiiiie” just shut the hell up,
She came near to give me a close up.
Aaaah she said it was sum one else but me,
“That” day Mrs.Murphy felt my agony.
My friends told me she had tears in her eyes,
She stood up with a long sigh.
My days in the school then changed forever,
With her efforts n support I became better and clever.
I could sit at my desk and also pay attention,
My homework became a timely submission.
I was into everything sports, theater and declamation,
The curses were replaced by sincere appreciation.
Finally my mom’s prayer were answered,
And her ediie became Edward Malcom De niro ,
The shabby little boy who was ignored and surpassed.
Was the talk of the school the new junior hero,
All thanks to genuine Teachers like Mrs.Murphy.
Who could notice in me what others couldn’t see,
All my life what looked like a fight, but
I Have now come to terms with my ADHD
I Have now come to terms with my ADHD
Listen To My Story...
Hi ,guys I am Rohan ,
And I am seven years old.
I feel the problems I face,
Have to be told.
I look like everyone,
And yet I am different.
The qualities I lack,
Are not so evident.
I can see everything,
But it’s so difficult to write.
There’s no one around ,
to understand my plight.
The numbers in the book always dance around,
The A’s and B’s fly up above the ground.
How can I spell if I can’t recognize,
The letters in my mind are not the same size.
Every teacher tells me to work hard,
Every face makes me feel I am not that smart.
So come out and help me while u can.
Cause if you won’t then who will understand.
I may be different but am I unwanted???
Had that been the case my life wouldn’t have been granted.
I have a purpose in life like you,
I will take more time than u guys do.
Love me less or love me more,
Do as u please but please don’t ignore.
I am here and will always be,
Whether u can or u cannot see.
Whether u can or u cannot see.
|The responsibility is yours
It is my responsibility the secret to success is that simple. A recent passion of mine was to understand what makes a legend, a legend. How are these special few able to become such inspirations, while the majority lead lives which appear ordinary at the best?
Finally, I know a single-line philosophy can change everything around: “If it is in my life, it is my responsibility”. The man thrown on the railway platform could have blamed the officer or cried at his bad luck, but he did not. Instead he took the responsibility for what happened to him. The result? An ordinary barrister emerged as the Father of the Nation.
She could have wept, and questioned God for creating the extreme poverty outside her school, but she did not. Instead she took responsibility for what she saw. The Result? Years after she passed away, Mother Teresa’s Missionaries of Charity feed millions of people each day.
Too often, I have given in to the temptation of blaming other’s for what was going wrong in my life. Last year my Best Friend Died, she was just 26 of a disease. I wanted to pursue an M.Phil from abroad but couldn’t make it due to family pressure. I began to resent my parents and friends for not understanding me which made matters only worse.
However, once this sentence “If it is in my life, it is my responsibility” came into my life, I realized that if I wanted to create opportunities and attain certain luxuries, I should be able to fund them myself. This simple change enabled me to begin a lucrative project which is also deeply enriching.
Today I realize that tough times didn’t last but the invaluable lessons they taught me did. No experience was unnecessary. Although I did not have the wisdom then, I know. “If it is in my life, it is my responsibility”. I no longer shun my life and the responsibility that comes along. The result? I feel I am living a dream. I don’t leave things to chance or to another person, until I have fulfilled my part of deal. If my health is not fine, I take control. If my relationship with a friend is not as close as before, instead of waiting for her to call, I take responsibility to call her. I make it a point that my parent’s needs are properly taken care for. Expectations from others or life at least to a small extent has turned into expectation from self.
The best part about his is the moment I stopped expecting others to provide me with happiness, love and financial security, and decided it was my responsibility and worked towards it, life turned its cards in my favor. From the smallest of issues, like the coffee not being to my liking, to larger ones like dealing with my parent’s health issues and mine too, I will do my best and only then, will life do the rest. Let us not turn the equation around and spend our lives in expecting what we want from life…LETS PROVIDE for ourselves…